It’s a universal Truth. All human beings, at least, have a first
encounter with the experience of separation.
When exactly, I don’t know.
It may even be a subconscious feeling and experience when leaving
the mothers womb, or the first breath, or the cutting of the
umbilical cord.
But for me, although I cannot remember the early birth experience,
I clearly remember my first conscious experience, and trauma,
of separation.
I guess I was around three/four years old and living with my parents
in Dagenham Essex in the United Kingdom. We lived in a three
bedroomed corner council house, next to a large park.
My father was a steam train engine driver, and he was obviously
working his night shift. I was put to bed in the early evening. My
mother decided to simply go out to the next door neighbour,
Mrs Rawlings, probably just for a simple chat and a cup of tea.
I guess she would have done this many times to while the time
away from Dads night shift.
Unfortunately, for her that night, I was not fully asleep. She hadn’t
even got past the front gate when I rushed into her bedroom and
literally screamed the house down! I remember that I was quite
uncontrollable at the time. I screamed for my mother not to leave me.
My poor mother. She had to come back into the house and console me.
Eventually, I must have fallen asleep. Whether she stayed in, or
went back to Mrs Rawlings I don’t know.
This first conscious experience of separation was very traumatic
for me. A simple seemingly harmless act turned out to be something
that stuck within me all my life.
After a year with a psychoanalyst in 2003, fifty seven years later,
he concluded that this child trauma had a significant effect on my
worldview concerning security, relationships and intimacy.
Maybe the first conscious experience for others may not be
traumatic at all. I am not sure what is supposed to be the normal.
Presumably, there should be no trauma? I don’t know. Maybe we
all have a first traumatic experience of separation?
Certainly, we all have a first experience of separation!
I now wonder to what degree this traumatic act had on my
subsequent seeking for the Truth, and the eventual realisation that
we are not separate, but connected as One and All.
Let’s face it, this spiritual Truth of One and All is totally and
diametrically opposite to the physical act and illusion of being separate!
Even our scientists, today, will confirm that we do not end at the end
of our skin. There is no physical end or boundary to our skin.
Under a microscope / spectrometer we realise that we are really a
spectrum of energy that fades in intensity between people to give the
illusion to the human eye that we are separate. In reality we are all
connected in the same soup of energy, or I prefer the metaphor of the
same one Ocean of life.
At the sub-atomic level, in Truth, all beings are One being of energy
that is simply flowing and ‘becoming’ all the time.
I wonder if we all have to have this experience of ‘apparently being
separated’ to then be given the motivation and opportunity to then l
earn the Truth of no separation?
It has been said by many that life on planet earth is a spiritual school,
and we all need to have a set of experiences that are contrary to the
Truth, to then cause and enable us to seek and realise the Truth?
Can you remember the details of your first encounter with the
experience of separation?
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